Vertical Integration

By: - August 27, 2019

As 2020 approaches you’re going to see a lot of manipulation posing as news. Okay, you get that. At least those of you reading this column do, given that the headline doesn’t include the president’s name or that of one of his most nefarious foes. I’ve found that when it doesn’t contain those figures of notoriety, the topic does not interest certain individuals.

Thus consider yourselves the few and the proud. I won’t finish the third part of that famous ad slogan because I doubt you had crayons for breakfast or paste for lunch. Like you, Brad.

I digress.

Yes, the spin will be furious. You likely think it is mostly for ideological porpoises. It isn’t, as these almost dolphins are notoriously politically apathetic. But sure, much of it will be to further an agenda. For the Left and its myriad number of media outlets the talking points are to advocate for socialism, the Thought Police, and for $3 billion in reparations for anyone who was ever looked at wrong. For the Right and its several outliers it is to stump for the free market, patriotism, and every American’s constitutionally guaranteed right to own and operate their own tactical nuclear weapons system.

But for both it is mainly for vertical integration.

What’s that? Let fictitious GE CEO Jack Donaghy explain.

How it works in politics is this: People vote, give donations to campaigns, and get involved in campaigns more when they’re angry than when they’re happy or satisfied.

Those campaigns spend zillions with media outlets in advertising. They also hire media types to sponge off the public dime for a while if their side wins. Then said media poobahs, or government officials who become media figures like ABC’s George Stephanopoulos, just spend their careers regularly cashing in from both ends.

So it makes financial and professional sense for the media to do all they can to rile up to frothing frenzy their respective bases, usually regardless of facts, to get their guys or gals in office and also reap the ad blitz rewards from pols who want the same results for different reasons. Get it?

All sides indulge in this. Think yours doesn’t? Take a gander at your pet politicals who go right to media after their term in power. Sarah Sanders, anyone? Newt? Think of media bigfoots who score spots in administrations. The above-referenced George, Heather Nauert? Still doubt it?

It’s why my columns with come hither headlines and fire-breathing invective go through the roof in views. People have been conditioned to love being pissed off. Columns like this one, long on analysis and absurd attempts at wit, will only be fully read by you guys, sentient adults who tend to take an intelligently cynical and jaded view of spin no matter where it comes from.

So for the Final Jeopardy answer it’s vertical integration. Or let’s call it Kamioner’s Law: Do not ascribe only to ideological fervor what is generally executed more out of material and status avarice.

Has a nice ring to it, eh?