“Every time I look at someone’s success in life, I notice one absolute – they live a life without excuses. Every successful person has failed, and failed repeatedly. What sets them apart is their ability to point the finger at themselves first and foremost.”
In my last article on the racial divide in America I want to speak a bit about personal responsibility when it comes to race relations in our country. First and foremost, racism absolutely exists. It is alive and well. I would even say that it is thriving due to the divisiveness and rhetoric going on in our nation.
Unfortunately, those beating their chest the loudest about racism tend to alienate those who they are supposedly attempting to educate. This ends up turning rational people against them. In fact, I would even say it ends up driving people to have racist views. This is based on an idea called labeling theory. The basic belief behind labeling theory is that if you call someone a deviant long enough, they will become a deviant. I would say the same thing is true about racism. Call someone a racist long enough and they will eventually give you want you want.
I would love to be able to speak about racism in America, but it would have to be an honest and open discussion, and it would have to involve all sides taking responsibility for not only their actions, but how those actions holistically affect the attitudes of others.
For example, the Economic Policy Institute (EPI) states that “Nearly half (45 percent) of poor black children live in neighborhoods with concentrated poverty, but only a little more than a tenth (12 percent) of poor white children live in similar neighborhoods.”
Black or white, male or female, tall or short, straight or gay, we all make a choice as to who empowers our destiny. Either we retain that power for ourselves and meet our aspirations, or we choose to give it to someone else and allow for them to dictate our fortune.
I can believe this. I can even believe that this was an inadvertent construct of government in an attempt to assist poor black families and provide them with government subsidized housing. I would also even be willing to concede to the fact that for generations there was a glass ceiling for those who were not white males. Again, this is supposed to be an honest discussion.
I would even agree with those who state that there are still companies out there who will not hire or promote those who are not Caucasian. Even in our government we had an elected Klan member from 1959 until 2010; his name was Robert Byrd and he was a Democrat. There are still Americans who will never accept that race simply doesn’t matter. They will always view human worth based upon classifications that have no bearing on the true depth of a person’s spirit.
I recently read an incredible article by Justin Simien titled, “5 Things to Know About Black Culture Now” that was posted on CNN’s website. In this article he talks about the difference between the cultural effects on blacks and the packaging and reselling of mainstream black culture. “Black culture, sans quotes, is the sum total of cultural contributions to the mainstream by the black subculture. It’s a fluid and a multifaceted, often contradictory thing. Meanwhile ‘Black Culture’ is a lifestyle standard made of assumptions about black identity, often used successfully by marketers, studio heads, fashion brands and music labels to make money.”
I can agree with this statement as well. In creating a “Black Culture,” many Americans try to classify those who are black into their own interpretations of what they culturally should be. I believe that this too is racist and completely ignorant.
With all of this stated, I still do not feel that America is inherently racist. Racism does exist, and I believe that it likely will continue to do so until we have simply eradicated race through interracial births. Ignorance will simply never disappear, nor will the ability for the human race to hate based upon what divides us, no matter how insignificant the divisive factor may be.
However, as I stated at the beginning of this article, there needs to be accepted responsibility from all sides, especially those who scream racism at every drop of the hat. Black Lives Matter is a great example of this. I see signs carried in their protests that state “F*** the Police,” yet where is their attempt to engage community policing or recruit police cadets from within these same communities? They blame the police for the violence within these predominately black neighborhoods, yet put no responsibility upon the criminals who actually commit the crimes.
If someone wants to allow their race to be their excuse for failure, then that is what they will get. If someone wants to use it as the driving force behind their success, that too is what they will find
This is in no way an excuse for police brutality of any sort. Whether it is law enforcement or the military, we must have a very high set of moral standards for those who stand guard over our society. Yet I fail to see them denouncing black on black crime. More to the point, I seldom see the outcry when riots happen and businesses owned by the very people in these communities are destroyed. Where is the demand that those who commit these acts take responsibility?
We can look at the failure of inner-city schools as well. My wife worked in such a school when we moved to West Virginia. The school’s student population was predominately black and substantially below the poverty level. The school itself received substantially more funding than any other school she had ever taught at before. She found teachers that were burnt out and ill-trained and a staff that was simply sub-standard.
Why is it that these schools can simply not attract good teachers and staff? It is not because the system is set up against these children or that there is a racial or economic bias against these areas. The problem is that the children are simply not prepared to attend school. Some of the reasons are constructs of being poor such as children coming to school hungry or lacking the proper seasonal clothing. Yet this is not what pushes the good teachers out of these schools.
The problem is that these children tend to lack parental role models in their lives who teach them responsibility and respect. Is this a black issue? No, this is a lower socio-economic class issue. However, it does tend to disproportionally affect blacks. Yet we don’t look at these parents in disdain for the damage that they are doing to their children. Instead, we blame the teachers for not doing in 1,260 hours annually what the parents fail to do with their remaining 4,580 hours (assuming eight hours sleep per night).
How about we look at the percentage of absentee fathers within the black community? According to Fathers.com (in which they site the U.S. census bureau), in 2010 approximately 48.5% of black children were living with only their mother compared to 18.3% of white children and 26.3% of Hispanic children. When are we going to hear an outcry of outrage from the black community about this travesty?
I am tired of the race card being played as an excuse for lack of success. I am equally sick of being told that I am racist because of my values, beliefs, and most importantly because I am a white male.
Every time I look at someone’s success in life, I notice one absolute – they live a life without excuses. Every successful person has failed, and failed repeatedly. What sets them apart is their ability to point the finger at themselves first and foremost. Black or white, male or female, tall or short, straight or gay, we all make a choice as to who empowers our destiny. Either we retain that power for ourselves and meet our aspirations, or we choose to give it to someone else and allow for them to dictate our fortune. Race can play as big or small a role in that as you choose to let it.
If someone wants to allow their race to be their excuse for failure, then that is what they will get. If someone wants to use it as the driving force behind their success, that too is what they will find. At the end of the day, only we can be responsible for our own success or failure.
