At Least He Brought Donuts

By: - July 10, 2019

Cops never quit marveling at the you-can’t-make-this-up nature of police work. Here’s an example of why. The King County (WA) Sheriff’s Office (KCSO) recently posted an incident on Facebook, one that confirms this description.

Not long ago, around midnight, a male, 26, shattered the KCSO Fairwood Substation’s (mini-precinct) front window. He broke the window because he hates cops, right? A lot of that going around, but nope. That wasn’t it.

After the suspect broke the window, he entered the building, graduating from vandalism to burglary. So, what did the burglar take? What items did he steal? Well, the suspect didn’t take a thing. In fact, rather than steal something, he brought something. But I don’t want to get ahead of myself.

A responding deputy arrived and located the suspect. The suspect was reclining in the deputies’ report-writing room. He “had his feet up on a chair, watching TV and had just finished smoking a cigar.”

The deputy asked the suspect if he’d broken the window. He calmly confessed, “Yep.” He explained he’d rather go to jail for damaging property than for killing his roommate. The sheriff’s office has not elaborated on the roommate’s alleged offense.

The suspect was also concerned that the deputies would be angry with him smashing the window. So, he did what, well…what no burglar I’ve ever known would do. He brought donuts for the cops. He’d bought a dozen donuts from an area grocery store on the way to the sheriff’s office substation.

The suspect’s caper was an apparent success, as deputies arrested and booked him into the King County Jail. What happened to the donuts remains a mystery. Although, my suspicion is the deputies went by the book, properly packaged, and then entered the donuts into the evidence unit.

Sure they did.

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